Preparation for motherhood

I am cranky.

These days, everything takes at least 3 times the effort, and makes me 3 times as tired.

I know, I know. You say "you just wait until the baby gets here." But at least the tiredness at that time will have a point and a purpose, and I'll be taking care of our child. Right now, except for the melon-belly, I don't look any different and from an outsider's point of view I shouldn't be acting any differently. At least, that's how I feel -- that I should be able to work my usual now-and-again 12-hour days, then go back to work the next day, then come home and do chores for several hours, then repeat.

But I can't. I left work at 6:30 on Monday night and let coworkers handle a meeting that would go until 9:00. Today I left at 4:30, stopped by the grocery store on the way home, fixed some lame takeout on a plate, threw a couple of loads of laundry in, and spent the rest of the time on the couch. It damn near killed me. During the usual struggle getting the fitted sheet back onto the bed, I nearly started to cry. I am hugely disappointed in myself because I'm missing a black sock.

I really need to chill.