Four Months Old (yes, it's my coffee break)

Andrew is four months old today! Such a big boy. I can't believe how time has flown.

I happened upon this post on "The Dark Side of Breastfeeding" from the Lactivist blog. It pretty much sums up a lot of how our breastfeeding experience has been so far -- demanding, wonderful, challenging, exhausting, exhilarating...Yes, it is more "convenient" than formula-feeding, but I didn't have a child for convenience's sake, and as long as my "girls" are able to produce enough breast milk for Andrew, breast milk will be what he gets. I regret the 6 ounces or so of formula we've given him so far, just to "get him used to the taste," in case I ever have to supplement at daycare. The last time I gave him a small bottle (2 oz) of formula, he started vomiting afterward, and he continued to vomit for about an hour straight, and it scared the hell out of us. Now I'm worried that he's developed an allergy to the milk proteins found in formula; it didn't help that Miss L. at daycare told me that her daughter did the same thing, and that the last time they had given her formula, she stopped breathing and had to be taken to the emergency room (note to self: buy Children's Benadryl).

So, we'll be continuing the breastfeeding, exclusively, until he's at least 6 months old. In four months, we've had two bouts of mastitis, surgery on a breast abscess, plugged ducts, cracked and sore nipples, major breast leaks onto clothing, near-sleepless nights and days when it seemed like all I did was sit on the couch and nurse this child. Even if he sleeps "through the night" (defined as more than 5 hours at a stretch), I am still woken up with painfully engorged breasts, wondering whether I should wake up my peacefully sleeping baby or risk another case of mastitis by "waiting it out" until he wakes on his own. I've spent many, many hours at work with my door closed, pumping. I've had to sheepishly explain to coworkers why I cannot attend meetings at 9:00 a.m., 12:00 p.m., or 3:00 p.m. -- fortunately, most of them are women who understand the situation.

It's still completely, totally worth it.